Chocolate Peanut Butter Crumble Bars
1. You suddenly realize you are drunk in front of your future in-laws.
2. The doctor says, "I think we need to try forceps."
3. You are mid-recipe for these completely insane Chocolate-Peanut Butter Crumble Bars.
If the name alone doesn't get you into all sorts of trouble, then maybe a rundown of what we're dealing with here will: a chewy, nutty, oatmeal cookie-like base, a salty-sweet streusel topping studded with chocolate bits, and to hold it all together, a layer of what basically translates to peanut butter caramel hovering in between. Oh, I said it. Like a young lady who drinks her face off in front of her future in-laws, I said it.
Now, I know you may be thinking to yourself, "Sweet Lord, Shauna, you're throwing something with chocolate and and peanut butter and sweetened condensed milk at us four days after Christmas?!" Just hear me out, okay? Yes, these bars are crazy, I know that. But! They came out of a need to clear out the few last bits of goodies that were acquired from weeks of holiday baking and entertaining--some half-consumed bags and bars of chocolate, leftover nuts from cocktail noshing, that sort of thing. So these bars are resourceful! These bars are green, people! They are also chockful of health! Heart-healthy nuts and oats, guys!
Also, there's only a couple days left to ride that cushy denial train until we arrive at the New Year and skinny jean-fitting reality comes crashing down on us. Won't you join me? All aboard!
You truly can make this recipe all your own. I've listed some suggestions, but go with whatever varieties of chocolate and nuts you happen to have on hand--milk, dark, semi-sweet chips, bits of stocking-stuffer candy bar, salted or unsalted nuts, whatever you've got. If the nuts are raw instead of roasted, a quick toasting while the oven's preheating adds a nice touch of flavor.
5 ounces semi-sweet chocolate, chips or chopped 1 1/4 cups all-purpose flour 1/2 teaspoon baking powder 1/4 teaspoon kosher salt 1/2 cup (1 stick) unsalted butter, cut into 1/2 inch cubes, soft but still cool 3/4 cup dark brown sugar, lightly packed 1 cup old-fashioned oats (not instant or quick-cooking) 1/2 cup chopped mixed nuts (I used half pecans, half roasted, salted almonds) 1 egg, at room temperature 7 ounces (about half a can) sweetened condensed milk 1/4 cup creamy peanut butter (crunchy is ok, don't use natural peanut butter)
Position an oven rack to the center position and preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Line an 8x8-inch baking pan with a strip of parchment paper or aluminum foil that will fit along the bottom and up two opposite sides of the pan with a bit of overhang to create "handles" to easily remove the bars later.
Sift the flour, baking powder and salt together into a large bowl. Using your fingertips, rub the butter into the dry ingredients until the mixture resembles large breadcrumbs. Stir in the brown sugar, oats and nuts. Put about a quarter of this mixture (roughtly 1 1/2 cups) into a small and stir in the chocolate bits. Set aside.
Into the remaining three-quarters of the crumb mixture, stir in the egg until it comes together into an evenly moistened mass, sort of like a loose cookie dough. Pat the dough into the bottom of the prepared pan and pre-bake for 15 minutes.
Meanwhile, stir together the sweetened condensed milk and peanut butter until well-blended. When the bottom layer of the bars is finished pre-baking, spread the peanut butter mixture evenly over the warm layer. Sprinkle the reserved chocolate-crumble mixture evenly over everything and press down lightly.
Return the pan to the oven and bake for 20 more minutes, until golden brown. The bars will feel very soft and not done in the center, but they will set as they cool. Let the bars cool in the pan for 10 minutes before running a thin knife along the edges and removing the slab to a cooling rack to cool completely. Cut into 16 squares. Store any leftover in an airtight container at room temperature for up to 4 days.